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Switch On

I have been waffling on whether to get the Switch 2 or a regular Switch or nothing at all for quite some time. To a certain extent, the question itself was silly – if you weren’t going to get a console after seven years of its life, you clearly weren’t all that interested, yeah? Just let it go. And I was doing just that.

Then, my son was meeting some new friends and they asked if he played Minecraft.

*cue MGS guard exclamation mark sound*

To be clear, my son hasn’t actually played Minecraft… or any formal videogames at all. There’s been some “educational” apps and the Nex Playground sort of things, but nothing what I would consider serious. Indeed, I had actually been waiting since his conception for a time when he would be ready to ascend to the P2 position (or technically P3). So, sensing some weakness in my somewhat-crunchy wife’s protective shell, I decided to turn up the heat.*

The funny thing is, I didn’t know how my son would play Minecraft. I bought it ages ago on PC but there’s no way he’s going to play it there. Of course, Minecraft has been ported to literally everything, so we’re technically spoiled for choice. But how could we play it together? Sure, there are probably some workarounds like cross-play from a tablet to the PC or phone to tablet. Or, you know, a game console.

So, yeah, this past Prime Day I bought an OLED Switch.

As pictured, it was a new OLED Switch with Mario Kart 8 Deluxe for $275 from Woot. I legitimately thought about trying to do some legwork and find a Switch 2 bundle someplace despite it costing double – you know, for future-proofing – but on the whole this “experiment” seemed safer anyway with a 6-year old. Besides, I had sorta regretted not getting a retro handheld with an analog stick and, well, here one is. Playing N64 games would require a subscription, but ehhhh it’s probably fine.

The funny/sad thing is that, at the same time as all the other frantic research being done before the end of the Woot sale, I actually got around to figuring out and executing on Switch emulation on my PC. So… maybe I didn’t need to be buying anything, really. Still, overall I feel like a legit Switch would be a good family-room style option to have. If it doesn’t work out in a couple of years, hey, Nintendo gear does appear to retain a lot of its value based on my eBay searching.

[Fake Edit] I’m going a little bit overboard, I think. Purchased the following:

  • Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild [$45 via Costco voucher]
  • Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom [$45 voucher trick above]
  • Super Mario Bros Wonder [$38 eBay]
  • Super Mario Party Jamboree [$45 Woot]
  • Super Smash Bros Ultimate [$44 Woot]
  • Super Mario Bros Odyssey [$40 Walmart]

That’s… a lot. Aside from the two Zelda games though, everything else are physical cartridges. I technically would have preferred digital games – who really cares for possibly losing cartridges around the house? – but the thought process is that physical games would retain some amount of resell value into the future. I’m positive that any of those Mario games would sell instantly on eBay for $30, for example. Will they continue to do so 5 years into the future or whatever? We shall see.

Something something, treat yo self.

…oh, and I’ll probably need Minecraft at some point too.

* I talked everything over with my wife beforehand, of course. Give me some credit.

Stars’ Rug-Pull

Stars Reach is the Raph Koster moonshot that, as far as I can tell, has immediately shot itself in the head. The official Kickstarter will be active at the time of this post, but some of the pertinent details have become clear in a fireside chat with Koster (emphasis added):

[…] The game itself, however, will be free-to-play at its full post-early-access launch, with an optional sub (called a “property pass”), supporter packs, a cash shop, all for cosmetics, not P2W items. “We’re not gonna break the economy for the sake of the Kickstarter,” Raph Koster says.

The devs don’t want players thinking of the property pass as a subscription – “We’re avoiding saying the word,” Koster admits – but it pretty much is; that pass will be required to own homesteads and to receive early access to new cosmetics. If you let the pass lapse, your house will just pack up and be ready for you to place again when you resume (Stars Wars Galaxies, basically). […]

Let’s review for a second. Stars Reach is a game about exploration, gathering resources, fighting mobs, all with an entirely player-based economy. It is being billed on the official website as a “massively multiplayer sandbox RPG” meant to “immersing yourself into an alternative world of adventure.” And it will be Free-to-Play!

…unless perhaps you want live anywhere you will be playing. That will cost you a $10/month subscription.

But it potentially get worse! I was taking it as a given that players would have some base-level ability to set up crafting stations inside a spaceship or whatever, even if you weren’t paying space-rent. You know, like in Starbound or No Man’s Sky. But according to the preview on homesteading:

A Homestead is a patch of a world that you claim as your own. You set up a camp, register that camp with the Transplanetary League, and voila!, it is yours.

Now you can build on that plot of land. You can create a home, a shop, a manufacturing facility, a farm, a giant robot…whatever you desire. If you claim a homestead in space, you can build a starport, or hollow out the interior of an asteroid as a smuggler’s base, and more.

Combine that with this other Reddit AMA thread:

Proximity will matter a lot.

  1. You have limited inventory. Ships also have limited inventory. If you want to transport a lot, you will be dragging it behind you in wagons or containers.

That means you will have to physically (and relatively slowly) move goods from the wilderness to your spaceport, from orbit to a wormhole to another space zone, across that other space zone, across however many astroid fields, nebulae, etc, as there may be, until you get to orbit around the destination planet, land, then schlep the stuff to its delivery location. And monsters are probably going to be trying to steal it the whole way.

Neither of which indicates to me that the space hobo way of life is especially supported. By which I mean any F2P player. Because what are you going to be able to do on a foundational level? All items decay and have to be replaced with player-produced ones. Lugging around resources is apparently going to be painful. I’m taking it as a given that players will be able to craft basic items without needing a homestead, but who even fucking knows at this point? There’s a flowchart on the “Stars Reach Tour” that I have helpfully annotated with the latest information regarding the property pass:

It truly boggles the mind. Or would, if these “industry veterans” were not a font of dumbass ideas.

I have less than zero interest in Stars Reach at this point. It was already conceptually hostile to solo players, but I still had it in the back of my mind as a sort of “challenge” to engage with down the road. But paywalling the one aspect of the game that is remotely sticky enough to get players to stay? No thank you. It’s almost as bad as the devs from Forever Winter with their real-time water mechanic.

This AI Ain’t It

Wilhelm wrote a post called “The Folly of Believing in AI” and is otherwise predicting an eventual market crash based on the insane capital spent chasing that dragon. The thesis is simple: AI is expensive, so… who is going to pay for it? Well, expensive and garbage, which is the worst possible combination. And I pretty much agree with him entirely – when the music stops, there will be many a child left without a chair but holding a lot of bags, to mix metaphors.

The one problematic angle I want to stress the most though, is the fundamental limitation of AI: it is dependent upon the data it intends to replace, and yet that data evolves all the time.

Duh, right? Just think about it a bit more though. The best use-case I have heard for AI has been from programmers stating that they can get code snippets from ChatGPT that either work out of the box, or otherwise get them 90% of the way there. Where did ChatGPT “learn” code though? From scraping GitHub and similar repositories for human-made code. Which sounds an awful like what a search engine could also do, but nevermind. Even in the extremely optimistic scenario in which no programmer loses their jobs to future Prompt Engineers, eventually GitHub is going to start (or continue?) to accumulate AI-derived code. Which will be scraped and reconsumed into the dataset, increasing the error rate, thereby lowering the value that the AI had in the first place.

Alternatively, let’s suppose there isn’t an issue with recycled datasets and error rates. There will be a lower need for programmers, which means less opportunity for novel code and/or new languages, as it would have to compete with much cheaper, “solved” solution. We then get locked into existing code at current levels of function unless some hobbyists stumble upon the next best thing.

The other use-cases for AI are bad in more obvious, albeit understandable ways. AI can write tailored cover letters for you, or if you’re feeling extra frisky, apply for hundreds of job postings a day on your behalf. Of course, HR departments around the world fired the first shots of that war when they started using algorithms to pre-screen applications, so this bit of turnabout feels like fair play. But what is the end result? AI talking to AI? No person can or will manually sort through 250 applications per job opening. Maybe the most “fair” solution will just be picking people randomly. Or consolidating all the power into recruitment agencies. Or, you know, just nepotism and networking per usual.

Then you get to the AI-written house listings, product descriptions, user reviews, or office emails. Just look at this recent Forbes article on how to use ChatGPT to save you time in an office scenario:

  1. Wrangle Your Inbox (Google how to use Outlook Rules/filters)
  2. Eliminate Redundant Communication (Ooo, Email Templates!)
  3. Automate Content Creation (spit out a 1st draft on a subject based on prompts)
  4. Get The Most Out Of Your Meetings (transcribe notes, summarize transcriptions, create agendas)
  5. Crunch Data And Offer Insights (get data analysis, assuming you don’t understand Excel formulas)

The article states email and meetings represent 15% and 23% of work time, respectively. Sounds accurate enough. And yet rather than address the glaring, systemic issue of unnecessary communication directly, we are to use AI to just… sort of brute force our way through it. Does it not occur to anyone that the emails you are getting AI to summarize are possibly created by AI prompts from the sender? Your supervisor is going to get AI to summarize the AI article you submitted, have AI create an agenda for a meeting they call you in for, AI is going to transcribe the meeting, which will then be emailed to their supervisor and summarized again by AI. You’ll probably still be in trouble, but no worries, just submit 5000 job applications over your lunch break.

In Cyberpunk 2077 lore, a virus infected and destroyed 78.2% of the internet. In the real world, 90% of the internet will be synthetically generated by 2026. How’s that for a bearish case for AI?

Now, I am not a total Luddite. There are a number of applications for which AI is very welcome. Detecting lung cancer from a blood test, rapidly sifting through thousands of CT scans looking for patterns, potentially using AI to create novel molecules and designer drugs while simulating their efficacy, and so on. Those are useful applications of technology to further science.

That’s not what is getting peddled on the street these days though. And maybe that is not even the point. There is a cynical part of me that questions why these programs were dropped on the public like a free hit from the local drug dealer. There is some money exchanging hands, sure, and it’s certainly been a boon for Nvidia and other companies selling shovels during a gold rush. But OpenAI is set to take a $5 billion loss this year alone, and they aren’t the only game in town. Why spend $700,000/day running ChatGPT like a loss leader, when there doesn’t appear to be anything profitable being led to?

[Fake Edit] Totally unrelated last week news: Microsoft, Apple, and Nvidia are apparently bailing out OpenAI in another round of fundraising to keep them solvent… for another year, or whatever.

I think maybe the Dead Internet endgame is the point. The collateral damage is win-win for these AI companies. Either they succeed with the AGI moonshot – the holy grail of AI that would change the game, just like working fusion power – or fill the open internet with enough AI garbage to permanently prevent any future competition. What could a brand new AI company even train off of these days? Assuming “clean” output isn’t now locked down with licensing contracts, their new model would be facing off with ChatGPT v8.5 or whatever. The only reasonable avenue for future AI companies would be to license the existing datasets themselves into perpetuity. Rent-seeking at its finest.

I could be wrong. Perhaps all these LLMs will suddenly solve all our problems, and not just be tools of harassment and disinformation. Considering the big phone players are making deepfake software on phones standard this year, I suppose we’ll all find out pretty damn quick.

My prediction: mo’ AI, mo’ problems.

The Forever Sigh

A few months ago, I was very interested in The Forever Winter, the post-apocalyptic extraction shooter.

After reading this PC Gamer article though, my interest has dropped precipitously:

Then there’s the water situation. This is the most essential resource, and when my hub runs out completely the area is reset, costing all of the practical and cosmetic enhancements I’ve made, and my inventory will be gutted. Even before then, when it’s critically low, some services become unavailable. And this all happens in real-time. 

“One of the things that actually came up in our beta, that we’re keeping, is that the water level has real-time degradation,” says Gregg. “If you and I log off with 10 days left and you come back three days from now, you’ll have seven days left, even if you haven’t played. It’s a hardcore game, you can build up a large surplus, but that is actually part of our co-op: to make sure people help each other.” 

Good fucking luck, chief.

The great irony here is that I praised them before for basically being concept artists following through on their vision way outside the norm. Not many other devs would put spacesuit-wearing flame-thrower units using American flags as hoods into their games, nevermind the battle-tanks covered in corpses as camouflage. That’s cool! If you go grimdark, go all the way.

Having an expiration timer count down even when not playing though? That’s not “hardcore,” that’s just fucking stupid. I don’t even care how easy water is to get in-game, because that is irrelevant. What is the design attempting to accomplish? Because by default, what this tells players is that any break from the game may as well be permanent. Meanwhile, the people who are playing the game aren’t even affected by this “hardcore” feature. Ask the Icarus devs how that shit worked out for them.

I guess we’ll see how it plays out. The Forever War will be in Early Access at the end of September.

Stars Reach is Reachin’

Got the heads up from Wilhelm, but apparently Raph Koster is making a new MMO called Stars Reach. It’s in a pre-alpha state, but apparently there will be a playtest for select testers this summer.

They also posted this YouTube trailer:

A lot of the YouTube comments were shitting on the art direction and general Fortnite vibes. Which… I guess? It doesn’t look awful to me, notwithstanding the pre-alpha animation and textures. I’m pretty used to Early Access survival games anyway, so graphics are not necessarily required beyond a certain minimum. Looks more like Wildstar to me and I liked that game.

Wilhelm already dissected a lot of the official promotional material, so I wanted to focus on the Reddit AMA Raph did a few days ago instead.

That said, it still has to look good, of course. We are aiming for graphics akin to Genshin Impact, Breath of the Wild, etc. It’s a broadly appealing style that maximizes audience (frankly, a large chunk of the audience is turned off by hyperrealistic graphics. It “codes” as being for hardcore players only, typically male players).

As far as the sci fi angle… the mandate was “do to sci fi what WoW did to fantasy.” A huge huge part of WoW’s success was its stylization, and people also complained that it was cartoony and kiddy at the time.

This was Raph’s response to someone concerned about the visuals. Again, I have zero issues with Genshin Impact-style visuals, and frankly, this is really the first time I had an inclination that someone else did. Perhaps I have been unplugged from the MMO population for too long.

Right now, planets are aimed at being a few kilometers on a side. The Servitors have placed a force field bubble around the area they are letting humans settle, in order to preserve the planetary ecologies. […]

We are intentionally not a seamless world. Having partitioned zones lets us do:

  • an ever changing map where planets can be discovered and can go away, wormholes can collapse, etc
  • worlds that are actually consumable — mine out all the gold, it’s GONE. Pave the planet over and turn it into a shopping mall.
  • segmenting player control of areas on really bright lines for things like PvP rulesets
  • cheaper operating costs since we can bubble zones up and down really easily in the cloud

Err… uh, whoa?

In case you click on no other links today, let me summarize some things. Each planet basically has one 4km zone where players can go wild. Planets (or rather these 4km cubes) are completely procedurally-generated to start, within certain parameters. There are actually a lot of physics in the game, including gravity, fluid dynamics (i.e. water flowing to new spaces), and temperature. Also, seasons. However, players are also free to essentially strip-mine the planet to bedrock and then it’s just… gone forever. Which may or may not be a big deal because these planets can just be blipped out of existence by the devs depending on whatever criteria they please. Or maybe they will just refresh the 4km cube and leave the planet as-is. But it doesn’t appear to allow more than one 4km cube per planet.

Now, the obvious question is “how do you prevent other players from deleting the ground beneath your house?” Or, frankly, griefing in almost innumerable other ways under this system. The answer appears to be: government. The details are sparse at this point, but players can be elected to be a governor of a given planet, and they can set the rules for what other people can do. Presumably some of these rules include being able to destroy any blocks, build things, and so on.

The obvious follow-up to that should be: can I solo govern my own planet? Right now, I don’t see a clear answer. Maybe one doesn’t exist because they haven’t implemented it yet. But I suspect the answer is No. Otherwise it would be easy for an industrious player to beam down, lock the planet, strip-mine all the resources, and cart it away. Or, you know, basically everyone trying to get their own personal planet. However, without that ability as a solo player, that opens up a nightmare scenario of landing on a unpopulated planet, building your dream house, and then a guild popping down, instantly electing one of their own dudes as governor, and Eminently Domaining your ass off-planet.

The strip-mine scenario can be resolved via game mechanics – “all that ore is too heavy and requires multiple trips to move it anywhere” – but social griefing is a particularly pernicious design weed. We’ll have to see how they address it. I’d be surprised if it was an EVE-esque “that’s content!” approach.

[Fake Edit] Just found Raph’s response in another thread:

So how it works is that until a planet is claimed (via barn raising, a group action) it belongs to no one.

Once it is claimed, the government of the planet actually has the power to set permissions on all the things you are worried about. Including banning people, build permissions, planet modification permissions, etc.

So, yeah, that’s a nightmare for solo people. Best you can hope for is joining a governed planet with friendly policies, and just hope nothing changes (e.g. you get kicked off planet, your base destroyed, etc). Yikes. What’s worse is that Raph seems to think the government thing itself is a good enough guardrail to prevent griefing. As if we don’t see IRL government griefing all the goddamn time.

It’s action combat inspired by a variety of things:

  • we take a bit of twin stick shooter DNA. You can run in one direction while firing in another. You have dodge rolls, etc.
  • We also draw inspiration from more arcadey feel. We want it to be super accessible, not a giant confusing hotbar. So we reference stuff like Smash TV a lot.
  • We also want it to be deep. So we look at MOBAs a lot for weapon variety and tradeoffs and the like. Avi, gameplay engineer on combat, has said that he wants the system flexible enough to make every attack in LoL possible for designers.
  • But we know that a lot of MMO players are fans of tactical thinking and tab targeting and the like too! Weapons can be customized to have varying degrees of lock-on. There are tradeoffs there — if you have tab lock on, then maybe in exchange for aim not being required, you have a tradeoff on firing pace, damage done, etc. You can actually see homing shots already in the videos we released.

I like how they mention Smash TV as if that is something anyone under the age of 40 would understand. Like, I played the 1992 SNES port back in the day, but what an otherwise ancient reference.

It’s amusing how many times Raph has mentioned about wanting the game to be accessible, focusing on horizontal progression, no chasing “numbers go up” and such… and then introducing what sounds a lot like a twitch-based bullet-hell combat system. Does the tab-targeting versus free-aim even matter if you are expecting your players to be shooting a different direction than they are running all while dodge-rolling? Unless the difficulty is dialed way, way down to where it doesn’t matter at all, horizontal progression is actually more difficult than vertical. At least in the latter case, you can theoretically out-level/out-gear the encounter; in the former, you have to “Git Gud” or group with people who have.

Anyway, that’s Stars Reach for now.

…a game where you can explore, strange new 4km worlds, start building your dream house, and watch it all be taken away by foreign bureaucracies who drink your milkshake in the name of capitalism. Or sadism. Or both! Unless you start your own nation-building company to sell your votes to desperate solo players who just want to build a planetside home. Although perhaps the devs will anticipate such chicanery and dissolve governorships when the population falls below X level or requires Y amount of upkeep costs that is unreasonable for solo players. I can’t wait to find out!

Set the World on Fire

So, there’s a new Fallout TV trailer and it’s… fire.

The original trailer was pretty good, but this one is taking my hype to an entirely new level. Irreverent, ultraviolent, post-apocalyptic, tragic, it’s hitting all the tones that make the series one of my favorites.

Amusingly, some people on Reddit are critically examining the trailer for lore inconsistencies. Example:

There are some great “Acktually” moments in the comments though. Yes, if the bombs dropped on 9:47am on the East Coast, it’d be before 7am on the West. However, the whole war lasted “two hours” so it isn’t impossible for LA to be nuked 20+ minutes after DC. Besides, there are lore inconsistencies in the games themselves such as the clocks in Fallout: New Vegas being stopped at 9:47 despite also being in a different timezone (Obsidian likely just lazy with reusing assets), or why people were at drive-in movie theaters so early in the morning, children in school on a Saturday, and so on.

Regardless, these sort of “criticisms” are encouraging precisely because they are so trivial. If you have to go full Neil deGrasse Tyson to complain about something, everything else you’re doing must be pretty good. Compare that with, say, Amazon’s Lord of the Rings show or the Borderlands trailer. Or don’t, in the latter case, it’s awful. Granted, Fallout isn’t out yet, but still! Really looking forward to this one.

Reddit Blackout

In case you were unaware, there is a sort of Reddit protest currently underway. Essentially, ahead of an expected IPO, the Reddit admin team pulled a Twitter and changed their 3rd-party API policy from “free” to “a gazillion dollars.” It’s a gazillion because the price was intentionally set so high as to make it practically impossible for 3rd-party apps to function, even if they started charging a subscription fee. This suits the admins just fine, as either A) the apps die off and more people get funneled into the official (ad-supported) Reddit app, or B) they get paid lots of money.

The planned protest was on 6/12 and 6/13. On those days, the moderators of 7000-9000 subreddits turned those subreddits Private, essentially shutting them down. At first, it was difficult for me to tell something was amiss, as all the new threads in subreddits that didn’t protest continued to pile up in my feed. But when I went to look up commentary on the latest Hearthstone balance patch, I realized nothing was showing up. So I left it and went about my day.

The latest news though is that the protest is continuing for many, many subreddits. Perhaps indefinitely. The Reddit CEO did an Ask Me Anything session ahead of the protests and essentially told everyone to eat cake, which certainly did not help. It is anyone’s guess how this will end though, because while the Reddit admins are fully capable of booting the mods and unlocking the subreddits at will, somebody will still need to mod those spaces. For free, in their spare time, likely fighting a slew of ex-mod power users with a sudden influx of free time. Sort of highlighting the fact that Reddit itself doesn’t actually produce any content.

Do I have skin in the game? Sorta. I have used the Reddit is Fun app since before there was even an official Reddit app in the first place. But RiF is getting shut down on July 1st because of the API changes. And it is undeniable that the official app is a big step down in functionality (plus ads everywhere). The browser version will still work though, and I haven’t heard about Reddit Enhancement Suite getting shut down, so the experience won’t be too different at my desk.

RiF on left, Official Reddit app on right, after a lot of setting changes

The biggest loss though are some of the subreddits I have subscribed to. For example:

  • /r/Hearthstone
  • /r/CompetitiveHS
  • /r/GuildWars2

There might be more, but I only noticed those because I had shortcuts for them – private subreddits no longer appear in my subscription list otherwise, so it’s hard to tell what else is missing. In any case, all three of those subreddits are going dark indefinitely until the API changes are rolled back.

To be honest, I have no idea how to “replace” those communities. Like if I wanted to read some commentary on Hearthstone, I would be stuck with Hearthpwn, the sorta weekly Vicious Syndicate reports, and… what? Official Blizzard forums? Discord? I looked forward to the VS reports being posted in /r/CompetitiveHS and then reading through hundreds of comments about other peoples’ experiences running those decks, changes they made for their pocket metas, and other minutia. Similarly, the GW2 official forums are in no way a possible analog of the content produced in the /r/GuildWars2 subreddit. It was precisely the variety and sort of auto-sorting (by upvotes/downvotes) of quality content that is the reason I have been using Reddit for the last 10 years.

Times change, but this is hitting me rather hard, even if Hearthstone/GW2 aren’t exactly my #1 interests currently.

Having said that, broadly speaking, I support the protest and blackout. Enshittification is apparently inevitable, but that does not mean we should go quiet into that good night. The prospects for success are low, but they aren’t zero, and doing nothing gets you nothing. Let’s just see what happens.

Like Souls

In the past two weeks, I played a few hours of Blasphemous and Salt & Sanctuary. Both of these games are in the increasingly crowded 2D Soulslike genre, made famous by Dark Souls (or Demon Souls if wish). As I was farming some currency to level up a bunch of times in Salt & Sanctuary – and before remembering I had previously played the game for 10 hours a few years ago – I had a thought. I have played a lot of Soulslike games over the years… and not actually Dark Souls. That’s weird, right?

So, it’s happening.

Not certain whether I’m going to chronical this shit, or just give the occasional summaries. Not much oxygen left in the room between Elden Ring and decades of Youtube videos of people beating the entire Dark Souls trilogy without taking a single point of damage while using a DDR dance pad as their controller. That might be two separate videos. Whatever.

If you want to see me “Git Gud” or otherwise maintain my adequate levels of Gud, buckle up.

Sleep Mode

I miss sleep.

That baby I alluded to is home, having arrived quite a bit early. I took two weeks off while he was still in the NICU, trying to get everything set up ahead of time. There should have been enough time for all the things, but there wasn’t. Now he’s here and my wife and I are trying to figure out the process by which each of us can get enough 1.5 hour increments of sleep to function as human beings.

  • Change diaper (2 min)
  • Warm milk (3 min)
  • Feed baby (15-20 min)
  • Burp baby (5 min)
  • Pump (30 min)
  • Wash pump parts (5 min)

The above has to occur every 3 hours, round the clock. And doesn’t include, you know, general touching of that baby or any of the ancillary chores such as washing clothes, self-grooming, eating, etc. We have kinda figured out that I can do everything but pump (it’s not super effective), and so we work in tandem to theoretically do everything in one ~40 min block of time (some things are sequential) rather than 1.5 hours. Still, come 2 AM, one of us is on baby watch and the other is trying to sleep, and then it’s back to solo attempting to do all the things across 1.5 hours, which isn’t really all that possible with a crying baby. And next week, I’m back to work because ‘Murica.

We’re kinda muddling through things currently, but I have reasonable confidence we’ll figure it out eventually. Perhaps by the time he graduates college.

Then it will be back to gaming!

Vanilla Challenge

With all the talk about private vanilla servers and the ease in which they are logged onto, I had an idea for some gonzo journalism. “I’ll join one and document my experiences!” Then I remembered something: a whole lot of the vanilla (and TBC) experience was utter garbage. Take paladins, for example. Just… the entire class.

SynCaine doesn’t see this as a possible problem:

I know you didn’t play WoW in vanilla, but do you honestly think some minor class issues (you are talking to someone who did the plaguelands rep grind using a raid spec tank) would have that big an impact on what is overall far superior content and design?

Uh… yes? The paladin experience was unremitting garbage on into TBC when I started, and by all accounts vanilla was worse. But, hey, that is clearly not going to impact the amazing 2004 design. Despite, you know, having to interact with everything through the prism of said garbage class design and moment-to-moment gameplay.

Amusingly, what we know from Nostalrius is that almost 25% of all characters on their two servers were Warriors. The Warrior/Rogue/Mage trifecta was nearly half. Three guesses as to which classes were on top back in the day.

Classes.JPG

Hmm.

But why speculate on these vanilla issues when we can pontificate? Put your money time where your mouth is, and roll a paladin on a private server now! Or a druid. Or a shaman. And don’t heal in dungeons or at the endgame. Nobody cares what sort of nonsense you put up with in 2004, what matters is the nonsense you are willing to put up with (and potentially pay $15/month for) today.

I’m thinking about doing so myself, despite my New Year’s resolution, and despite the fact that we all know what is going to happen. It will be awful because it is objectively awful if you are not zen meditating inbetween mob pulls. Vanilla was probably popular back in the day because it was the least painful entry into a nascent, virtual world filled with co-dependency mechanics to ensure you made internet friends. Which was great if you needed some, but I’m full up these days, thanks.

You know what, though? Fuck it. Let’s wreck this train.

VanillaWoW.JPG

Don’t say I never did anything for you.